We have many mutual pals, so I haven’t/can’t talk about this with someone. I am on a fastened source of revenue and would admire the cost and would additionally love to stay the friendship.
Lender: Keeping the friendship could be very a lot as much as the one that owes you cash. As it is, your friendship is compromised since you are each heading off discussing the cash he owes your husband’s property. Given the massive quantity owed, I think you could have an settlement on paper.
The option to carry this up is to be simple and truthful, conveying your sure assumption that this mortgage can be repaid. Make positive you could have get entry to to financial institution data, noting the unique transaction and the half-repayment. You will have to ship an e mail, with a view to have a report of your written communique.
I counsel the use of wording alongside those strains: “Dear ‘Steve’: I hope you are well. I’m contacting you regarding the outstanding amount you owe on the loan ‘George’ made to you before he died. According to my records, you have repaid $30,000 of the total $60,000 owed. After granting you extra time to repay this loan, I am now eager to receive the remaining amount within a reasonable time frame.
“I value our friendship, just as George did; he was happy to help you when you were in need. Let’s revive this conversation in order to get this matter settled.” If you don’t obtain a answer, or if the answer isn’t cheap or appropriate to you, then you definately will have to touch your attorney to pursue it for your behalf.
Dear Amy: I met “Stacy” a just right 10 years in the past, and we’ve been off-and-on pals ever since.
But just lately she’s discovered what medicines I take and the entire physician’s appointments I have, and she or he received’t forestall bugging me about coming off of the beginning keep an eye on tablet I’m these days taking. I’m 37 and I have a very critical and painful reproductive situation and am following my doctor’s advice for the easiest way to regard it.
I’ve had treatment two times, and I’m on antidepressants. But she’s been on me to forestall taking the tablet, and she or he’s these days pissed off at me for the decisions I’ve made. She is terribly anti-medication. I have blocked her on WhatsApp prior to as a result of this.
She’s these days on holiday and we’re now not speaking. Should I simply put out of your mind her?
Lost: I think that “Stacy” gleaned all the clinical information about you since you disclosed it to her. And I think you feel sorry about having performed so.
Quite merely — your clinical problems and the remedy you’re receiving are none of her trade. Furthermore, her uninformed suggestions relating to your well being would possibly make issues worse for you, when you adopted them.
Stacy turns out like a vintage boundary-leaper. Yes, it turns out like the best time to transport clear of this friendship.
Dear Amy: Reading “Baffled in Boston,” who felt the wish to confront his older brother for abuse 60 years in the past, I trust you about those two brothers addressing their previous in a sure means.
My two more youthful brothers and I have been raised via a unmarried mom. She delegated many obligations to me, which led to me having to “mother” them.
My brothers idea I used to be her favourite and have been green with envy about it. Comparing notes as adults used to be therapeutic for all people and has advanced our courting. We are in our 70s and nonetheless uncover how otherwise the similar scenario used to be observed via every sibling.
Older Sister: I call to mind this because the “Rashomon effect,” in honor of the groundbreaking Japanese film that confirmed the exact same match from many alternative and conflicting views.
I urge members of the family to stay this in thoughts as they in moderation wade into early life occasions, working out after they do that many components, together with beginning order, temperament and gender, will render the similar occasions as nearly unrecognizable to different siblings.
It is necessary (getting into) to be open to all variations of occasions. This is what ends up in perception and working out.
© 2023 via Amy Dickinson. Distributed via Tribune Content Agency.